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It Really Is the Thought that Counts

10/1/2019

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Picture
​Today a small bouquet of flowers was delivered to my door. There was not a card with the flowers, so I do not know who they are from or who they are for. There are four people the flowers could be for any one of us. It does not matter; I choose to believe the flowers are for each of us individually.
 
The flowers are for my seven-year-old daughter because today is her first day of a school club. It is a club designed to nurture her creativity and build teamwork. Creativity and teamwork are the skills my daughter will need as she builds her “influencer” empire. She has 11 YouTube subscribers, so it will be a few years before she influences too many people. My daughter loves flowers and will be very appreciative.
 
The flowers are for my twenty-four-year-old daughter because today she made the first payment on her first house. My daughter is working three jobs because she plans to make double house payments every month and plans to pay off her mortgage in five to seven years. My daughter is “adulting” pretty well and amazes me every day. My daughter loves flowers and will be very appreciative.
 
The flowers are for my significant other because today (and every day) he puts his family first. My significant other is waiting two years to retire so our twenty-four-year-old daughter does not need to pay for health insurance and today he told me it feels like it will be a long two years. My significant other deserves a pick me up on a day like today; he does not love flowers and may not appreciate them.
 
The flowers are for me because someone was thinking of me and my recent health issues. I have been my normal, solitary self throughout my cancer treatments, yet my friends keep finding ways to let me know they care. I do not like flowers (for me), however that does not diminish my appreciation.
 
The flowers will be placed in a vase for the whole family to enjoy and each one of us can smile and think, “Those flowers were for me.”

Until next time...

Have a great day,
​Susanne

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Your Greatest Fear

7/31/2018

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woman speaking to a crowd
​Your greatest fear... It happened to me.
 
I suffer from a brain that always runs 100 miles a minute. On the positive side, I learn new concepts and skills quickly. On the negative side, my mouth frequently has trouble articulating those thoughts. That is one of the reasons I like to write my thoughts in a blog versus recording a video.
 
I was once asked last moment (15 minutes before) to speak about a specific social media topic to about thirty people. Generally, I am a very good public speaker. I rehearse like crazy before the event and although I usually forget those really impressive "quotables" I wrote in my practice script and kick myself later about it, my speaking engagements have always been well received.
 
Then your greatest fear happened to me.
 
The specific topic was not a point I really have explored so my knowledge was basic at best. I killed the opening and then I felt a sneeze creep in. That sneeze did not come but there was dead air and many eyes staring at me.
 
I came clean and admitted that elusive sneeze to the audience and they were on my side laughing with me. And then I fell from the frying pan into the fire.
 
I completely forgot the points I was going to move to on this particular social media topic. That 100 mile a minute brain? Crashed and burned. I spoke incoherently for about a minute before I had the good sense to open it up to questions.
 
I killed it on those answers and the audience forgave me for a minute of dead air and a minute of nonsense.
 
Have I decided against speaking in the future? Of course not. What could be worse than my brain deserting me? I survived losing my thoughts on stage and a couple of the people there even signed up for my email list AFTER that fiasco.
 
We can never be perfect. Do your best and learn from your mistakes. Will I accept a last-minute speaking gig on a subject of which I have a very small knowledge base?
 
Yes! And if I lose my train of thought I will go to questions immediately. (It is important to learn the right lessons after all.)
 
Until next time...
 
Have a great day,
Susanne

Check out my upcoming workshops here!

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The Multitasking Myth

4/10/2018

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Image of clock with words including busy, schedule, rush, late
Once upon a time someone said to someone else, “Look at me! I can do ten tasks at one time. I can talk on the phone, send an email, write a business proposal, help my child with their homework, cook supper, do laundry, sweep the floor and I can do it all perfectly.” Someone else believed someone and thus the Multitasking Myth was born.

Okay, it may not have happened exactly like that, but I am sure it was close. I confess to being the queen of working on way too many projects at the same time, however I do not work on all those projects at the same time. “What? You just contradicted yourself Susanne.” you may be thinking. Let me explain why that is not true.

Think about how your brain works. You are writing your newsletter and your phone rings. It is your mother inviting you to go shopping. You sort of listen to her as you continue writing your newsletter. As your mother wraps up the conversation, you realize that somewhere in the conversation with a distracted “Uh-huh” you agreed to take her and four of her friends to the outlet mall on Saturday. When you hang up and read your newsletter you realize what you wrote while “talking” to your mother does not make much sense and is full of misspelled words.

Our brains are not wired to work effectively on more than one task at a time. Although you may have several tasks to do on any given day, prioritizing and blocking similar tasks together enables you to work more productively.

I am currently creating new marketing images for 100+ blogs, updating materials for 18 workshops, writing bi-weekly blogs, writing my third children’s book, rebranding and probably five or six other projects that did not immediately pop into my head. I am at various points on each project from the one page I have written in my children’s book to the 50+ new marketing images I have created for my blogs.

I set time aside to work on each project individually, without distractions. I work on my children’s books on Sundays because I do that as a hobby. Since I have had some very severe health issues since February, I have spent a whole lot of Sundays in bed, not working on my book. (Hence, the one page.)

When I write a new blog (today) I create a marketing image to use to promote it. Since I already have the program I use open and I am in that mind set, I open six past blogs and create images to go with them. It will probably take me until August to finish my 100+ blogs, but I am not in a hurry and this system is working for me.

I have several clients for whom I manage email marketing. Mondays and Tuesdays are email days for my business. Because I edit and program emails one client after another I stay in the email mindset and finish quicker. I will be recording a video series near the end of the summer. I am creating the subjects and outlines now so I can record all the videos in just a day or two.

Take a look at how you structure your days. Are you trying to do all your tasks at the same time? Prioritize your projects and schedule the time to give them distraction-free attention.

Until next time…

Have a great day,
Susanne

​​Check out my upcoming workshops here!

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Your Habits Are Showing

2/27/2018

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magnifying glass hovering over the word team
Dictionary.com defines habit as “an acquired behavior pattern regularly followed until it has become almost involuntary”. In other words, a habit is something you do repeatedly and regularly without even thinking about doing it.

Developing successful habits for work, school, your business or your life is necessary if you want your career or happiness to grow. Your habits directly affect how you are perceived as an employee or an expert in your field and how your relationships progress. Some habits are good, some habits are bad. Some habits are completely neutral. Removing bad habits and replacing them with good habits takes time and persistence. Bad habits can affect your career and happiness.

Do you remember the White Rabbit from Alice in Wonderland? He was always hurrying because he was late. Think about the mistakes you make when you are hurrying and then think about how you feel when you let down your coworkers, clients or family because you can not seem to be on time on a consistent basis. This does not mean the occasional tardiness due to unforeseen circumstances is a problem. It means chronic lateness is a sign you do not value the person you are meeting and will in turn cause them not to value you.

Have you ever had a boss that micromanaged every task you did? I am going to raise my hand here. I AM that boss. It is so hard for me to let go. It is not that I do not trust others to do it right. I KNOW it will not be right because they do it differently than I do. The problem with micromanaging is that it takes time from the tasks you need to be doing. This does not mean you give assignments without any training or oversight. It means you need to trust your employees to do it right.

Are you a procrastination pro? Have you ever said, “Why do today what I can put off until tomorrow?” Some people love the adrenaline rush of cramming everything in at the last minute. Do you feel like you do your best work when you rush? What happens when you do not leave enough time to finish your project? How do you feel when the adrenaline (or caffeine) subsides?

How do you identify your bad habits from your good habits? In your personal life, you most likely already know what your bad habits are. In your work life, it might be more difficult to tell. One way to determine if you have a bad habit that needs to be changed is to ask others. Then you can work on changing them to good habits. Good habits are often recognized when you are getting the results you want from a certain aspect of your life, for example, your business is growing.

It is very hard to break old habits and form new habits because our behavior is ingrained into our neural pathways. Habits can be initially triggered by a goal such as a relaxing retirement. Over time that goal fades so the habit needs to become an automatic behavior. Repetition is the key to changing a habit. 

Start small and focus on one habit at a time. Forming a new habit is a lot of work and takes conditioning for it to become automatic. Trying to take on too many changes at once can overwhelm you. Start with one, even a small one, before moving on to another.

Give yourself time to develop your self-discipline. One way to do this is to create a visual map of what you want to achieve. For example, you want to be debt free. Create a visual map of what you need to do to be debt free. Include images and words that describe your desired outcome. This map reminds you of why you want to form that new positive habit.

Can you imagine how great it would feel if you could change all those old, bad habits into positive good habits quickly? There is no magic wand or easy button. Changing bad habits and creating new ones takes motivation on your part. You will have to self-motivate to do what it takes to make the changes you want. But in the end, it will be worth it.

Until next time…

Have a great day,
Susanne

​Check out my upcoming workshops here!

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Positivity Is Being Proactive Not Delusional

1/30/2018

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Megan Whited
​My adult daughter has a group of “best friends”. They are actively working to decrease self-negativity in their conversations. If someone says a line such as, “I am stupid.” while in the group, she is rewarded with playful arm punches as a reminder that words can hurt.

Megan recently told one of her friends, “I am unhappy with my body and I want to lose ten pounds of fat.” After her friend punched her, she protested because she did not feel her statement was self-demeaning. She stated a fact and expressed her proposed solution. She did not say, “I am a fat pig and completely useless.”

My daughter is thin, so most people would wonder why she would want to lose ten pounds of fat. Do I think she could lose ten pounds of fat? Yes… she keeps stealing all my chocolate and has some small “love handles”. Someone seeing her in any clothes other than a bikini might think she has a warped body image, however she enjoys competing in beauty pageants and she does some modeling where her chocolate weight will be noticed and judged.

Acknowledging your weaknesses and working to improve them is not negative, however when people think of self-improvement, they often focus their attention on their weaknesses. This can quickly lead you down the rabbit hole of beating yourself up about past failures or make you feel like you have too many weaknesses to overcome.

While negative self-improvement can send you in a downward spiral, unrealistic positivity is just as damaging.

Unrealistic positivity is when you ignore your weaknesses even if they are severely hindering your progress. Megan also belongs to a few “positivity” groups on Facebook. When she asks for ideas to help her overcome a weakness she is often met with ostrich advice or advice that does not offer a solution.

She recently posted in a group, “I am very creative and start lots of projects, however I have trouble completing them. How do I overcome this bad habit?” The advice ranged from, “It is not a bad habit; just accept it as part of you.” to “Team up with or hire someone who is good at follow through.”

Megan just finally graduated from a 1-year massage program after four years. Her lack of follow up IS a bad habit. She feels the weight of those unfinished projects and it affects her positivity. She is working very hard this year to complete several projects and massage school was the first project on her list. I am proud of her for pulling her head out of the sand and saying, “You can not expect others to do tasks they are not required to do.” Yes, the massage school was partially to blame for the extra time, however her lack of follow through probably added two of those four years.

The advice to team up with or hire someone who is good at follow through is not necessarily bad, however as she starts her massage business once she gets her license, she will be starting without clients and it may take a year or two to have a consistent enough cash flow to realistically hire an assistant. She needs to find ways to keep herself motivated in the start-up phase and that is why she was asking for help.

Megan also asked one of the groups for tips on getting rid of negativity and instead of replies such as, “I turn on my favorite jam when I feel negative.” or “I hit the gym and do 20 minutes as fast as I can on the stair master.” she received replies such as, “It is all mindset, just change your thoughts.” Of course, none of the mindset replies offered any suggestions as to how someone would actually change their mindset.

It is important to stay positive, focus on your strengths and work through or around (not ignore) your weaknesses.

Positivity alone is not enough to drive success. You can create an excellent vision for your personal life or business and stand in front of your mirror and recite your vision each day. What do you have a year later? A perfectly memorized vision and an awareness of where every freckle on your face is located.

You can recite, “I will lose 10 pounds of fat.” every day until you are blue in the face, however if you never work out or stop eating all your mom’s chocolate chances are in a year you will be reciting, “I will lose 15 pounds of fat.”

Add action steps and be proactive with your positivity and you will start to see your vision come to life.

Until next time…

Have a great day
Susanne

Check out my upcoming workshops here!

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